nine months
I can hear you super ego
Cape flowing
An “S” on your chest
Similar to the shape of my family crest
And the wanton wants of teenage years
Faster than a speeding pulpit
From which I hear doctrine preached
More powerful than a second guessed motive
That I’ve washed and bleached
Tumbled over and over in my laundromat mind
With worthless pennies clacking against metal sid-
-ing
Coins I’ve been hid-
-ing to give to God as an offering
Wishing my way into some real kind of change
But the Lord cries silence!
And the seas draw still
And the demons shut their mouths
For it is the Lord’s will
To see me prosper and not to harm me
Plans to give me a hope and a future
That word was a sour word
A little bird
That sang songs I never wanted to hear
Until you came around
Until God drew you near
And oh how I didn’t want to believe in this thing
It came with great expectations
This idea of goodness
This pip and this pep
This really fine dancer to which I can’t keep up my step
Cuz I don’t dance like you
My hips don’t move that way
But with that sauntering sway
You cut in for a moment
You convinced me to dance
Move my feet
Give it a chance
And so now hope is a word
Free of expectations
Redeemed from the world’s narrative summations
And from false explanations
And oh how I will dance
Naked and unashamed
Free from blame no need to cope
But when I say hope
You hear expectations
And you hear false claims and declarations
Because of our blood heritage passed down for generations
Well this is a rebuttal from my heart, my ventricle communication
I’m nervous
But I gotta get these butterflies to fly in formation
This is my fixation
This is my trope
To write you a poem, 9 months, make it dope
And I’m walking on a wire here, a tightrope
Cuz I can’t change you, I accept that, not gonna sit here and mope
So expect much of me, tie me to that rope
But know that when I say hope
I mean I chose you
Not chosen by fate
Or some crazy Greek God
Or because you had a nice bod
Or you had a great squad
Or a fancy facade
Or money for hot rods
Or because you would just say yes and nod
You are not the thing that the world says you are
Scarred, or an outsider, inferior or broad
worthless and flawed
Demure and submissive
Silent and meek
I knew you weren’t like that in the first week
So when I say hope
Know that you should expect me to love you to the greatest of my ability
Like Lamar Jackson running with his greatest agility
Like THE Barry Allen running with the greatest mobility
Like the dalai lama meditating with serene tranquility
Not like trump and his affability
Or his manic instability
More like Jesus and his infinite utility
His ultimate stability
His perfect immutability
His King of Kings nobility
This is our new story
Our infinite possibility
Our #baffledtogether humility
Our panda bear sensibility
Our potential synergy
Is limitless still
Will I marry this woman?
Yes I think I will
I’ll take that pill
Pop it just like my next question
But hold on, it’s time for a quick dance lesson
